Wednesday, March 28, 2012


He made it official. 

I know I am such a nerd for pointing this out, but I have a boyfriend.  The last time I actually uttered that statement was sometime in 2008. 

We were hanging out with his teammates and their wives at Coach and Willie’s and just having a great time.  We spent a lot of time listening to live music and dancing on the patio. At one point he made a new friend (he is constantly doing that) and was talking to this guy’s wife. I guess she pointed to me and asked him “Is that your girlfriend?” His reply? “No, but I wish she was.” Naturally, being a woman, she told me what he said.  I just got the biggest smile on my face and asked him if he really said that.  He tried to brush it off and told the woman she wasn’t supposed to tell me (in a joking way of course).

About an hour later (and admittedly a few drinks) he told me he had a question to ask me.  4th grader style, he asked me if I would be his girlfriend.  After saying yes, he told me he was probably going to screw up at times and that I should expect that.  I told him I understand and I know we both will at some point. That’s just part of relationships. He also kept telling me he likes me “more than I know.”  Seriously, he and the liquor shots he was taking said that about 5 times.  I can only imagine what he meant by that, but it still makes me happy.  He likes me for me.

I know I’m 28 years old.  I know that I’m acting like a total teenager.  I also know that I don’t care. I’m happy J  Hopefully March 22nd will matter in my future!

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

All Smiles

Things are going amazing with C. I still really can’t believe I met him.  I mean days after I post how maybe I should just give up and just date someone for the sake of dating them to have fun, I meet someone that fits everything I’ve been looking for. I get to have my hand holding in the car, kissing in the rain, cuddling on the couch moments with a good man.

I guess it just proves that silly statement “You’ll meet someone when you stop looking” true?

C reminds me a lot of my brother and my relationship with him.  He is a little goofy and weird and isn’t afraid to just be himself.  He makes weird noises and sings songs and does silly little dances.  I swear I do all of these things when I get around my brother. Yeah, I know, I’m weird too.

The other day we were walked by one of those water fountains that shoots water from the ground.  Usually there’s a few kids under the age of 5 soaking wet and running around through it. Oh and C.  He ran right through it smiling and laughing and saying he just couldn’t resist.  I had the biggest smile on my face. 

Last night I introduced him to my favorite restaurant (Someburros….mmmm).  Once we ordered he walked by the counter and noticed there were coloring pages and crayons for the kids.  He got one for both of us.  So we finished our dinner and sat there for a while coloring.  I loved it. Its totally something I would do and definitely not something many men would do! Our art now hangs on the wall above all the other children’s coloring pages.

Everything about him makes me smile.

Wednesday, March 21, 2012


Isn’t it funny how you can hear a few beats of a song or a few lyrics and instantly you are taken for a ride through you memories?  How a certain song can take you back to an exact moment?  Or even make you think of a certain someone? 

Being a vocalist, music is one of my greatest loves. I’m pretty sure you could say a sentence or two and I would start singing a song that ties along with those words.  It happens all the time. I break out into a random song…..often.

The other day I was thinking about how and why certain songs remind me of certain people and I thought it would be fun to really break it down.

My brother:
Boondocks - Little Big Town
Snow Patrol - Chasing Cars
I think both of these were just moments where we were driving in his truck singing our heart out.  I remember we heard Chasing Cards late one night when he was in town visiting for a holiday and we were going to the grocery store.  I remember the strip of road we were on and everything.

My (ex) best friend –
Iris – Goo Goo Dolls
This one of her favorite songs.  Even though we don’t speak anymore I still think of her every time I hear it. 

CH – High School boyfriend (he appears in this post as well)
Red Hot Chile Peppers – Scar Tissue
Martina McBride – I Love You
Jo Dee Messina – Lesson in Leavin’
Hmmm these three songs about sum up our relationship! The first was the play back song on both my pager and his when we met. Yeah that’s right, I said pager. Once we realized this we thought it was meant to be and it became “our song.” Yeah, a song with lyrics like “Push me up against the wall Young Kentucky girl in a push-up bra” and “Blood loss in a bathroom stall” was our song. So romantic huh? The next was a song a remember pretending I was listening to on the radio and singing into the phone when I was talking to him.  Hoping he’d get the hint or something?  I don’t know.  I was clearly crazy.  I had no idea what love was.  The final song, as you can tell, came about after we broke up.  Probably after he started dating one of the other girls on my pom squad. It made me feel better to sing it at the time.

AR – Another high school boyfriend (and also in this post)
Lonestar – Amazing
Dixie Chicks – You Were Mine
The first was a song I remember him singing in the car once.  I was with him in the back seat of his dad’s black Toyota Tacoma (I still love those trucks) and his brother was driving.  I think someone else was in the front seat too.  AR broke out with this song on the radio and I just thought it was the cutest thing.  The other was the song that was on constant repeat when we broke up.  I mean CONSTANT.  I think I listened to that song probably 25 times a day! I remember singing it under my breath when I was doing dances on the sidelines at basketball games and I’d see him in the stands.  Somehow, singing a depressing song made me feel better. I’ve always been that way. Weirdo.

DH – my final HS boyfriend and almost fiancĂ©
I Need You – Sonic Flood
I had known him two weeks (we eventually dated for three years) and it was Valentine’s Day.  We met at Denny’s and his clingy friend came with us.  When I got there, he started singing this song.  He was a musician and wrote songs often, so I thought he wrote it. It was fairly simple with a chorus that said “Love, I need love, You are love, I need You.”  It took two years for me to figure out that he didn’t write that song.  Kind of ruined it, but again it still was “our song.” Also, yes, 2 weeks after we met he told me he loved me. Woah.  

RF – boyfriend
Tim McGraw – Taylor Swift
Isn’t that an odd title to read?  I mean, which is the title and which is the artist?  So confusing if you don’t know it!  I remember telling him in the truck while driving past the Cardinals stadium going southbound on the 101 (yep, that detailed) that I liked this song. Then we sang it together. Why that reminds me of him I have no clue.

WH from NAU – went on a few dates
Colbie Caillat – Oxygen
I think this song was on when we were making out?  Super awesome huh?  Now I will remember him forever when I hear it.

FF -  boyfriend
Starting Line – Bedroom Talk
Seriously though, this song is terrible.  When we first started dating he told me this song reminded me of him because I was a good girl and wouldn’t um….you know. The chorus said “I'm gonna tear you’re a** up like we just got married and you're all mine now. Tonight is the night we've been waiting for all our lives or maybe for just tonight.”  So yeah, he was insinuating we were gonna get married and then do that and he couldn’t wait. I should have run far and fast.

A the cop – boyfriend
Pat Green – Let Me
This is another one of those songs where I was making out and now it reminds me of that person.  The first lines of the song are “Keep your head there on my shoulder, let's just lay here for a while. We can hurry when we're older. And girl don't worry about tomorrow, that just seems so far away. Luckily me and you all that we have to do is follow,  just follow.”  It just felt so right at the time because I was laying my head on his shoulder and we were talking. It became “our song.”  I’m kind of mad I wasted that song on him, its such a good song!!

A the nerd – went on a few dates
Lady Antebellum – Just a Kiss
Yeah that’s right, I labeled him the nerd.  Because he totally was. This song actually came about AFTER we had stopped dating.  We went to a Lady A concert when we were dating and had a lot of fun.  After we stopped dating (we stayed friends) he text me one night and asked if I had heard this song.  Told me it reminded him of me for some reason. So now, its only fitting that it reminds me of him.

Well that was quite the list. I think I just detailed every major boyfriend/relationship I’ve had (and then some). 

I just found this quote:

“Music is what feelings sound like” – unknown

I think that about sums it up.

Friday, March 9, 2012

Best and Worst – Dating Someone New


Firsts -  first date, first time you hold hands, first kisses, first time they use a pet name (like babe or hun)….ahhh the list goes on and on.


Head games – Oh my goodness where to I begin? Do I call him now or later? Do I play it nonchalant and wait for him to text me first every day? Should I say this or just play it cool?  If I really want to hang out with him, do I act like I don’t so I don’t seem over eager? Do I say this or will it scare him away?  What is he thinking?  Oh no, he didn’t text me, he must not like me anymore!  My mind seriously overanalyzes everything. It’s terrible.

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Mr. Right?

So….he likes me J

Our night on Friday was perfect.  We ate dinner at a BBQ restaurant (he sat next to me instead of across from me), walked around some outdoor shops, then rented a redbox movie (30 Minutes or Less) and drank some wine. We spent the night inching closer and closer together, feeling each other out.  Like I said before, he is just so hard to read.  Once he finally kissed me though, I knew.  I think we spent a total of 9 hours together and I didn’t want it to end.

We spent all day Sunday together getting him moved into his new apartment.  I think we spent four hours at Wal-Mart and Target. He made me laugh all day and it was nice to do something so low key and feel so comfortable.  It felt so natural. We ordered pizza and I even let him see my quirks… I put the pepperoni pieces off to the side and eat them all at the end because they are the best part.

I’ve never met such a gentleman.  He makes sure I walk on the inside in parking lots so I don’t get hit, walks in front of me down stairs (and behind me going up them) in case I fall, opens doors, and always sits closest to the door. I thought this stuff only happened in movies!

He’s perfect, absolutely everything I’ve been looking for.  Which scares me to death. Is he too good to be true?

Monday, March 5, 2012

Cautiously Optimistic

So....I met a boy.  Well, I've met lots of boys I suppose, but this one is special. He is very attractive, tall (6'4),  and a total gentleman. 

I've been helping out my friend A that plays for the Rattler's (the one I went to Vegas with) and given him a few rides around town. The other day, he brought along a teammate, C.  We totally hit it off. 

We've chatted during the day every day since I met him, which is  really only 4 days ago.  I've hung out with him twice and we are going out again tonight. He asks me how my day was. He texts me goodnight. He texts me good morning. He even called to say goodnight last night.  It's been years since I've had a man do that. I love it :)

I wish I had better radar because what I can't tell is if he actually likes me or if he is just bored and loney in Arizona and needs a friend.  He is from Tampa but the team is currently living in a hotel for training camp.  He also doesn't have a car yet, which means he can't go anywhere unless someone takes him.

So......I'm being cautious.....but optimistic.


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